Life gets hectic. If anyone knows that it’s me. It’s easy to get caught up in the craziness of it. Your body, mind and soul get disconnected, and you find that you are slowly losing yourself. When you hit this point, it’s one of the worst feelings in the world.
The good news is you have the freedom of “choice.” It’s when you decide to make better decisions for yourself, which ultimately lead you to finding happiness.
It’s what I call a “detox” but it should become a long term approach, not a fad: steps, routines, habits and choices you need to consciously make every day in order to become and stay happy.
To get to this place, you firstly need to ask yourself what is holding you back in life. What or whom is it that you identify as toxic? What excuses are you making that stop your personal growth and development? What food, TV and other personal choices are getting in your way? Well, for many people it can be these six things:
The biggest mindset and behavioral shift you can make is eliminating the rubbish excuses that hold you back. Excuses include beliefs including I don’t have time (well you do, it’s just that you choose not to make X a priority); I can’t do this on my own (well you can, you’re a grown adult and you do a lot of things on your own, so figure it out); I don’t know how to do it (well you can learn just like you have in every other aspect of your life); no one is interested in what I have to say (well that’s a victim attitude and means you're choosing not to try. Who cares if some people don’t value you because they don’t operate from a place of gratitude? You have as much right as anyone to make your voice heard).
My point is, excuses are just reasons not to get something done. They’re useless and obstructive to your own wellbeing – even when you think you’re doing yourself a favor by inventing them! I hate excuses with a passion. I can barely even tolerate them. I dismiss them in my mind anytime I hear one, and if I dare to create one myself, even if there are legitimate grounds, I will defiantly overrule that thinking.
For a happier life you can’t be negative. For this reason, you need to get unstuck from negative thinking cycles. If you dwell on the negative things, thinking about them over and over until you're miserable, then you’re letting negative thinking get the better of you.
In this situation, even though there might be events or people that have triggered it, your actual problem is how you’re stuck in this negative thinking cycle. You can't think your way out of it because your brain is stuck! Force your brain to think of something else, by doing something else.
When you do this, you often find that you will develop different perspectives or attitudes toward those same problems later. It takes self-awareness but make sure you find ways to get unglued.
Activate your body with exercise, or cooking, or by meditating, or doing yoga, or take an ice-cold shower. These physical activities can short-circuit negativity and help you get back control over your mind.
By giving yourself a break from your emotions, you’ll also approach external problems with a fresh and better perspective, which will help you. Personally, when I take some time out in this way, I often discover a different approach to the problems that triggered my thoughts, and come to a better and quicker resolution about how to tackle those problems.
Self-doubt is a huge hinderance to a happy life. When you are constantly doubting yourself and your abilities, you won’t try things, improve, achieve, or grow as a person because your doubt prevents you from truly applying yourself. You are also likely to feel envy and dislike of others around you who are confident and self-assured.
There are several ways you can overcome self-doubt. You can practice self-compassion, look at your past achievements, and how far you’ve come. Another important thing to do is stop comparing yourself to others. Always know that everyone is authentic with their own strengths and weaknesses, so it’s impossible to accurately compare!
4. Toxic People
Toxic people are an absolute NO. These people might be those you consider friends or family, but if they are demonstrating toxicity, you become a product of your environment in due course. These people can create lots of stress and unpleasantness for you and others, not to mention emotional or even physical pain.
They can be destructive to your life and wellbeing. A toxic person is anyone whose behavior adds negativity, drama and upset to your life. Toxic people might be dealing with their own stresses and traumas but that doesn’t mean it’s acceptable to stick around for more!
5. Bad Food
Amazingly, the food you eat affects neurons, which are the major cells of the brain. In the brain, an unhealthy diet that is rich in fats and sugars causes inflammation of neurons and inhibits the formation of new neurons. This can affect the way the brain works and contributes to brain disorders like depression.
It’s tempting and time conducive to get junk food, but ultimately, you’re contributing to your own unhappiness over the long run – even though you might get a momentary thrill or enjoyment from eating such food.
6. Junk TV
If you’re trying to be happier, more confident, centered and stronger, then watching Junk TV that deliberately degrades, deceives, confuses, terrifies, haunts, shocks or depresses you, isn’t going to help you achieve that objective.
Remember: anything you absorb into your body contributes to your emotions and state of mind and that includes Junk TV. Making conscious choices over watching better quality entertainment is a big step toward improving your environment.
A person's environment can have an enormous impact on how they think, feel and behave - both consciously and subconsciously. I only watch feel-good, funny, light, musical and even educational TV because it feeds my better self. Everything I do in life has a specific purpose in making me the best version of myself.